dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
