And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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