dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Randomize
