I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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