Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
