Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"

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(810): View more from Michigan

Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.

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(631): View more from New York

I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.

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(631): View more from New York

woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?

(516): View more from New York

you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(410): View more from Maryland

It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.

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(480): View more from Arizona

It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.

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(415): View more from California

While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"

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