Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
