Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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