I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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