This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize