Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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