Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
