i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
