is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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