I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
