Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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