Soap is not a condiment
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
