I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
