Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
