Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
