Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize