Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize
