You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
