so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
