Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
