Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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