U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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