It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
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she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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