Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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