My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
