How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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