we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
This is classic penis vs brain.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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