You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
