yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
