Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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