That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
