she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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