She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
