My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
i think im in europe. pls send help
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize