Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
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