I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Randomize
