Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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