Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/c22r
  Replies (14) Good night (619) Bad night (3988)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life. http://tfl.nu/huxl
  Replies (168) Good night (6053) Bad night (6891)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA! http://tfl.nu/7pku
  Replies (348) Good night (44933) Bad night (5114)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (432): Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite. http://tfl.nu/cdg2
  Replies (49) Good night (7270) Bad night (1815)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me http://tfl.nu/oobt
  Replies (5) Good night (2203) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier. http://tfl.nu/u9m6
  Replies (15) Good night (3175) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that? http://tfl.nu/3r87
  Replies (9) Good night (3062) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (348): View more from

  I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (348): I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say http://tfl.nu/qtqf
  Replies (4) Good night (1010) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight http://tfl.nu/nnba
  Replies (18) Good night (1868) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true. http://tfl.nu/xlw0
  Replies (6) Good night (1580) Bad night (973)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD

  (469): View more from Texas

  My thighs feel like glass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD (469): My thighs feel like glass http://tfl.nu/m7pw
  Replies (3) Good night (1598) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle. http://tfl.nu/7gdx
  Replies (10) Good night (574) Bad night (1086)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up. http://tfl.nu/21lu
  Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas. http://tfl.nu/qzzy
  Replies (3) Good night (466) Bad night (278)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater. http://tfl.nu/uty6
  Replies (4) Good night (215) Bad night (503)

Randomize