I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
