Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
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