to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
