you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
It's rum buckets o'clock
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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