Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
