I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize