ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
