I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize